


Something In Common

by AA (Kyun)



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Bandaging, Bathing/Washing, Character Study, Dialogue Heavy, F/M, Feeding, Hurt/Comfort, Whump, Zuko burning himself and being taken care of basically, sedative
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 04:54:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29604141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyun/pseuds/AA
Summary: It's taken such a long time for Zuko to let himself be taken care of.
Relationships: Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 23





	Something In Common

**Author's Note:**

> Alternatives titles:  
> "I am going to WRITE A FIC that is so WHUMP."  
> "It's MY coping mechanism and I get to choose the whump."
> 
> Read and review.

Every once in a while, Zuko still asks for Katara to hurt him when he makes a mistake. On the floor, he tells her how someone's going to hurt him and that he wants the pain to please just happen already. That he has done something bad to deserve being torn apart and eaten even though he doesn't know what yet. How no one can know. More often, he is betrayed by the small things. Katara sees the light never reach his eye when he charms people. Alone, he is unable to speak. Denies needing anything. At times, she sees the hours in front of the mirror, pulling his hair over his burn. Years of living under the Fire Nation have bred a stubborn self-contempt; water washes away fire and burns remain.

She sees him fidgeting in his sleep, murmuring, "Please, don't hurt me" and "You're scaring me" and "You don't have to do this, please." Abruptly in the day, he asks her, "Are you mad at me, disappointed?" At his desk, he digs his nails into his palm, whispering, "I'm sorry" with his eyes shut. Eventually, everything bubbles over like fire does with water. Katara holds his hand when she helps him into bed after fainting even though he says not to touch him and to just let him go. That he can do this on his own like he always has. That he's not afraid of anything. It's not like anyone ever stays. This is not his first epidermal burn during a nightmare. She draws the blankets up to his neck, smooths the sheets down the flank of his body, and pulls his arm out to apply emollient slowly. As soon as he lies flat, Zuko's chest eases up.

"You're shaking, I can see it. It's okay. Lean against the pillow, stop talking, and go to sleep. I'll protect you; you've been on edge all day. I'm here," she says. "Hey, sh, it's ok. I'll never let you go. Just remember that you are special, you are loved, and everything is going to be okay." Then, like an afterthought: "Your eyes look really heavy." He's surprised when she doesn't say anything else. Doesn't ask how he's so calm despite being hurt, how she doesn't find the burn suspicious, how she doesn't ask if it was an Agni Kai, how the sheets rustle like the ocean... Katara had carried him, bridal-style, when he fell and ran her fingers through his sticky hair. She had asked him where the pain was and told him, "You shouldn't be walking around right now."

When she peeled the blankets back she said, "Take your time. Slow, slow. You're doing good. Let me take a look." Katara's good with her hands, worked quickly to pull the sleeve of a new pair of pyjamas over his shoulder, brought him into the bathroom and made him brush his teeth, and kicked the waste basket out from beneath the bed. His mind registers how nonchalant she is with everything. How she doesn't retch and snicker. Look disgusted. He wants to tell her. "Cold," he says instead, not even a sentence; his mouth and mind are cotton. He can't stop sweating and shivering, but the balm feels good and pain medicine is knocking him out, so he lets that happen. Katara had crushed a sedative into his tea. Zuko knows. Ran a tea shop.

A part of him hopes that she'll notice how compliant he is. Praise him. Tell him how adaptable he is. He wants to fall more and more beneath her control. Wants to hear her, "Oh, you're giving in." Katara tells him to stay still in bed and let her look after him; she needs to clean the burn before it gets infected. Zuko knows that she's lying; epidermal burns don't become infected. He'd like it though and wonders if she'd know if their eyes met. Wonders if she knows that he wants to be dripping all over the floor in front of her, simply so she can point it out and apply pressure there. How he thinks about breaking a bone to hear her say, "It's not supposed to bend that way." Becoming comatose only to wake up and listen to her voice: "You were out for a few days. How are you feeling?"

It's a warning, he knows. She must think that he's avoiding her out of fear or confusion because she says so. Asks him if he has questions. Questions... Zuko considers being funny. _Am I dying? Is everything supposed to go dark? Who turned out the lights? Why is the room spinning? I can't move. When's the last time that I slept? I don't know if I can sleep with these bandages..._ Oh, yeah, that is starting to hurt. Everything hurts... He's never really been funny. Why was he always hiding? _Will you hold me?_

"Will...?"

"It's called lavender and it's starting to hit you, I think. Try to wiggle your fingers. I want to make sure that they are okay." He tries and she speaks sweetly to him like the small movement was an accomplishment. "It's not your fault. It's not your fault," she tells him, but in his mind it is. Sometimes before, she would tell him, "We've all done bad things. Somebody loves you" and he appreciated but could never allow himself to believe her. Sometimes, she wouldn't look strangely at him when he hummed, would keep him close even though he refused out of politeness, would say, "If you want to talk, I'm here" and that meant a whole lot more. Sometimes, he wants to tell her, "I feel safe with you," but instead he says, "If there's anything I can do, let me know" and "Here, let me." Their relationship is built on unspoken words.

"Stay with me. Don't go inside, Zuko. Don't sit up, just relax." She wets a cloth and applies the fabric to his sticky fever hair. Zuko can hear the bath drawing. Remembers other times when Katara has done this for him. When he had ruptured an organ, Katara had been sitting, motionless, beside him while he heaved. He said nothing but, "Don't go. Don't do anything. I'm scared" and that's what she did. Months before that, Katara had went searching for him when he had hidden himself away in his room during a panic attack. "You were screaming. Why are you hiding?" she said. "I'm scared, okay? There. Something happened here, something bad." Telling someone had felt nice. Katara had even pulled him back into bed once, reading his temperature to him, when he had tried to disentangle himself.

How many times had it been...? At first, he had repeated, "Get away" and "Stop, I want to stop. It's getting worse" and "Leave me alone" and "Don't make me" and "Please, don't lie to me. Please, please, don't lie to me." She never had though and Zuko had been broken down piece by piece every time she told him, "You're not okay, please, let me help." He still remembers when he said, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to react that way. Please, tell me that I didn't hurt you." She was still talking. "You're safe. You're going to be safe. We're somewhere safe." He believes her. She talks a lot and she says nothing, but Zuko believes her. "I'm back like I promised," but he never remembered her leaving.

"It never really stopped... The shaking is still there..." She speaks almost like she is only talking to herself now. "I'm coming closer and I'm going to put a hand on your shoulder, all right? Hold onto me, you'll be okay... Are you doing better?" He is going to ask why, but she presses the lip of a spoon close to his mouth. The soup tastes salty, tangy, and savoury on its own. Zuko wonders how much is Katara and how much is him, where the thread of Katara stops and where he ends. He falls into her arms again and again, but she always seems to want to catch him and go somewhere quiet. She is a Water Tribe Healer. Maybe he will for ever be burned in a way that goes deeper than flesh.

He closes his eyes and says slowly what has been weighing on his shoulders. "Katara, I love..." 

"It's alright, I get it." she says. "I do."

**Author's Note:**

> Woke up from a hangover and began having fits in bed alone. Decided to write fanfiction. Bone apple teeth.
> 
> I'm always embarrassed, writing this stuff, but I decided to push through. It always comes out differently each time.


End file.
